The Trap
How We Trap Ourselves In Self-Created Situations
Introduction
We can trap ourselves in life without even recognising it. Suddenly, we’re surrounded by walls that limit our options. The best way we can address this issue is by recognising the walls we build before we lay the first brick.
How We Trap Ourselves
The Comfort Zone Trap - We adopt routines and habits that often feel safe and comfortable. Sink too deep into this comfort and we can stick in a job, relationship, or a way of life for too long. Eventually, the life we live is no longer aligned with our deeper purpose.
The Identity Trap - Our identities are dependent on how we want to be perceived by others. We then can be trapped by maintaining these identities to appease others.
The Perfectionist Trap - The pursuit of perfection can leave us frozen. We delay taking action, believing nothing we do is good enough.
Photo by Victor Furtuna on Unsplash The Sunk Cost Trap - If we put resources into a pursuit, we can continue this pursuit unproductively due to the resources we’ve spent previously. We can cling to an imaginary scenario where our efforts pay off, even when all signs point to the opposite.
The Narrative Trap - We love stories, tied up with a pretty bow. Sometimes, we can get stuck in these stories. Maybe it’s what we believe success should look like, or happiness. If we continue to blindly follow these narratives, we struggle to deviate from the script.
The Self Sabotage Trap - Do you believe you deserve what you have? On occasion, we can self-sabotage our own success due to self doubt, procrastination, or the repetition of bad patterns.
The Fear of Discomfort Trap - We can avoid discomfort out of fear, but then we keep ourselves locked in unsatisfying situations. Short-term pain can often lead to long-term gain. The opposite occurs when we avoid this pain.
Breaking Free
In the midst of these potential traps, it’s worth asking how we can break free.
We first need to be aware of the existence of such traps to recognise them. Self-reflection of our own circumstances can help in recognising areas of our lives in which we could be trapped.
It’s from this recognition that we can then question our own self beliefs. What parts of our lives are self-imposed, or imposed by others, and which parts could we let go for the better?
When we’re trapped, we also can stay routed in place as a result. This can feel comfortable. But we have to embrace the opposite. Discomfort can directly lead to growth, and further recognising that nothing is ever perfect can limit the perfectionist trap.
Most importantly, when we find ourselves in these traps, it’s us who possesses the key. We hold the means to escape, but sometimes, it can be us who is hiding the key.
In my own experience sometimes a situation has changed for me when I’ve spent some time deepening my understanding about it which has then led to a change in my attitude towards it which in turn has affected my actions with regards to it. At any rate what I look for are those little moments which feel like lights turning on and I have a feeling of inner clarity and inner alignment. I feel at the center of my life in some sort of organic way rather than in reaction to it.