The Principles of Successful People #8
You are a combination of the five people you spend the most time with. If you’ve recently changed for the worst, first reflect inwards, and then look around you.
Combination - Bringing into or joining in a close union or whole.
Time - Duration regarded as belonging to the present, distinct from life to come.
Changed - To make the form, nature, or content of something different from what it is now.
Worst - Bad or ill in the highest degree.
Reflect - To think carefully, especially about possibilities and opinions.
Who we are is affected by our biology, our environment and our actions. Other people influence in a way that intertwines all three of these factors.
Our family determine our genetics and can affect our temperament.
Our actions are shaped by the people around us, while also reinforcing our habits. If we engage with positive people who are driven, polite, and caring, we will feel that positivity ourselves and will be more likely to adopt their characteristics. The opposite is also true. If a relationship is toxic, this will lead to the adoption of negative characteristics.
Finally, part of our environment is who we surround ourselves with. These people often determine the social environments in which we find ourselves. We learn behaviours by observing and then imitating others. If we surround ourselves with people who exist in damaging social environments or who undertake damaging behaviours, we will be influenced by this.
People affect us more than we realize. If we find ourselves slipping into negativity or destructive behaviours, we have to first reflect inward. Why have we not hit our recent goals? Have we lowered our standards and why? If an internal change has occurred, this could be for the better, but we have to self-reflect to know this.
Once we have looked inwards, it’s time to look outwards. Who do you spend the most time with? What are their attitudes, values, behaviours, and ambitions? If the environment in which they exist does not fuel you, it could be time for a positive change. Perhaps this could come from seeking out new mentors or joining new communities. This all starts with one small step.
The ultimate aim here isn’t to cut people out of your lives unnecessarily. It should be to build relationships with people who inspire you to be better. These people should challenge us and excite us because being with them naturally leads to growth.
If we pursue such relationships, the version of you in the future will thank you. After all, we should always aim to be the least smart person in the room. That’s how we can learn the most. If you’re ever the smartest person in the room, you’re doing something wrong.